Love the right way

Love-wallpaper-9930151There always comes a day when you will be sitting by yourself with your feet up, nothing on television and all of your favorite songs are played out. No one is calling you, your phone is dry. You will have no choice but to sit there and just think, if only for moment.

What things do you think about when you’re sitting alone and you start to contemplate on recent decisions you have made? When it comes to matters of the heart, how often do you reflect on past relationships or your current relationship? Or do other things take priority?

Let’s just say you decide to think about your love life because it just isn’t where you would like it to be. In my humble opinion, it seems that people have become quite immature about the whole concept of having a relationship in general. Is it because a lot of people come from broken homes where they have no true example of what companionship is supposed to look like? Maybe. I mean, how can you duplicate something you’ve never really seen? You most certainly cannot use movies as a guide because it just isn’t realistic. Unfortunately, romantic films and Disney movies do not prepare women for the reality of how many men view and express love.

More time should be spent evaluating the romantic and intimate relationships that we are in. Some people are rushing into situations for the sake of having someone and are ultimately unhappy. Who are you trying to impress? Why do people stay in unhealthy relationships for the sake of saying they have someone? Who are you trying to impress? This is the quickest way to end up in a dead end situation where you don’t have the guts to get out of because you settled and drug an innocent party along with you for the ride.

Healthy relationships take a while to develop. When you’re getting to know someone, obviously, you have to give it time before each of you truly feel comfortable revealing your true self. After this takes place, hopefully your differences complement each other and your similarities bring you closer. Hopefully, you both have been honest about yourselves and don’t have any other people in your lives that you are entertaining on an intimate level. This is a big thing in 2014, there are too many people with something on the “back burner” for a lonely night or as a back-up plan. When you find someone special, take the risk, cut off that irrelevant baggage of a situation that was lingering, and get focused. When you truly invest your time in one person, it truly pays off. At the foundation of every loving relationship is a true friendship that begin with bonding. Bonding takes time and energy. You can’t spread that too thin.

Be with someone who makes you feel good inside and out. Be with someone who brings out the best in you. Be with someone who inspires you to be better, that can help you see things in a different light. Don’t settle just because you feel it’s time. Don’t settle because the person is “good enough.” Go where your heart takes you. If you’re unhappy or unfulfilled in your current situation, remove yourself. If you feel that you can work towards making your relationship whole again, go for it. At the end of the day, if you’re just going to sit there and be unhappy, you will live to regret it. You may end up making some bad decisions that can hurt other people.

Love isn’t meant to be miserable. Can it be a little dull at times? Sure, sometimes in a long term situation things may get routine. But the movies don’t show you that. Real life will show you that ultimately companionship and someone who has your back until the end is better than the lie movies show where the butterflies never end. Stability and longevity is what real love is.

I want it all though. Butterflies, excitement, routine…I want to stick it out. How about you?

Cheers to love

When Things Begin to Crumble

20140523_172952It seems like you can never be too happy for too long. Just when you feel that everything is beginning to come together, something must fall apart or sometimes it feels as though it is everything falling apart. The worst thing is when you have to sit and watch it happen. It can domino into other parts of your life. It may impact the people you love.

What is that about?

Now, you can be the most optimistic person in the world and try to see the good in all things but in reality, some situations do not have any positives that you see or want to acknowledge.

Sometimes, I feel that I am a pretty strong person emotionally despite being mostly sensitive. Strength is something that continues to grow overtime with me. I have had quite a few experiences that have left me feeling pretty broken. These life lessons are always pretty bitter sweet and the older I get, the more I accept that bad things must happen. I have learned that I cannot truly anticipate tomorrow no matter how many great plans I make. This is why I have decided to steer my life in a more fulfilling direction of exploring the world and making new connections. I want to see as many places I can, laugh as many times as I can, and smell the flowers along the way. Before I become old and can’t move at all. At least then, my memories will be so many that I can just think about those things all day. Smiling.

I decided to write about when it feels like the world is crushing down around you. So many things in life are painful and bitter. So many things in life do not go with our grand plan. We have dreams that we sometimes give up because we have to build a family and we can no longer only be concerned with ourselves. We have relationships that end in the mist of a promotion that makes you wonder did the universe make you sacrifice one for the other? All these thoughts and things we deal with on a daily basis. When things seem to crumble, there are a few things we must remember, if only to keep us sane.

If life were predictable, would it be any fun? If there were no lessons or heartaches to go through, would we become truly a person of character and wisdom? Once you problem solve different areas of your life you’re back in a better place. Hasn’t that familiar place of things feeling right again always came back? It may not feel the same, but the feeling of content eases in. It is up to us to redecorate that place knowing how peaceful and lovely as we need it to be when it returns. Life is a rollercoaster, but you are destined to go back up. When things begin to crumble, let go of the pieces that are no longer necessary and move on. Take the wisdom with you.

Take Care

 

 

 

 

Live By Your Own Rules

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Depending on where you live or what your culture is, there seems to always be some type of unspoken rules that you are expected to live by. Some of them may have some value and some of them are just generational such as how you should conduct yourself as a lady or as a man. There are rules about how you should live your life once you become a parent or how you should spend your weekends as a newly married couple. The list goes on and could go on forever. People are often living their lives based off of who is watching them and judging them. People are living by what they think is expected of them for the most part. Continue Reading →