5 Things We do to Sabotage Our Peace

20140523_181546If having somewhat of a stress free life is one of your goals there are things you must consider when it’s time to deal with some of life’s occurrences. Stress is inevitably one of those things in life you will have to deal with on somewhat of a daily basis. As always mentioned, when we try to live a peaceful life it benefits us in more ways than one, including our health.

There are a few things that we do without realizing how it is impacting us and our journey to happiness. There are things that we are aware of that is sabotaging our true happiness, however, we ignore it or put dealing with it on the back burner. Some things may need a plan or inner strength other things are fairly simple to tweak or eliminate from our lives.

This list compiles five things that you may be doing or engaging in that is sabotaging your peace on a daily basis and ways to work through and or even eliminate these things completely.
Put on your seat belt and prepare to re-evaluate your routine.

1. Lack of goals and ambition- In modern society, we stress being successful whether male or female. However, success is not a guarantee of bringing us happiness if we are not doing what we love or something that brings some type of fulfillment. When you have goals in your life, whether it is buying a new home, starting a family, or building your own art gallery, it gives you something to strive for. When you don’t have your eyes on some type of goal and you lack ambition, life can be dull. When you lack a vision for your life, what else are you doing? Chances are, you are going about a daily routine that is mundane and unfulfilling. The minute you begin to have things to strive for you can avoid the negative feeling of having no direction in life. Everyone benefits from having a dream or a vision for their life. Achieving our goals bring us a sense of satisfaction and gives us confidence in our abilities.

2. Lack of healthy eating or exercise- You don’t have to be a gym rat or a vegetarian to achieve good health per se. However, when we at least attempt to make better food choices or engage in light to moderate exercise it improves our health pretty dramatically. In America, a lot of food is processed and some foods labeled as organic can still be questionable. It is important to pay attention to the things we put into our bodies and take on a mindset of building our bodies and immune systems up. When our bodies are healthy and functioning as they should, our moods improve and our brain functioning improves. Several scientific studies back this up. When you’re slugged down from unhealthy eating, we put ourselves at risk for health conditions that can cause anxiety and stress, not only for us, but for our families. When we take care of ourselves, we also have the benefit of seeing the results in better looking skin, healthy moving joints, disease free organs, and better looking bodies. If you are struggling with fatigue, getting sick easily, or frequent mood changes it could be what you’re eating (a lot of food contains hormones). You may benefit from changing your diet and increasing your intake of nutritious foods. We as a nation consume way too much sugar which has caused a lot of unnecessary sickness and obesity.

3. Toxic Relationships- Are you currently in a relationship that is a bit toxic? Meaning, you are mostly unhappy but maybe you’re too attached or too comfortable to really jump ship. One of the biggest stressors can be love issues and dating. Sometimes we yearn for love so desperately we settle into situations that we know are not for the best. There is no such thing as a perfect relationship and it’s important to try to work through issues when you are in a marriage or a more serious relationship if the pros outweigh the cons and you are both committed. However, some of us are in dysfunctional relationships with a lot of intense emotional highs and lows. Maybe you’re in a relationship where you have been cheated on repeatedly or you yourself have cheated on several occasions. Obviously, this is toxic for both people involved. One person is functioning as a doormat who is willing to accept sub-par treatment while the other person is acting in a careless selfish manner and should probably be single for a while until they are truly ready to commit. Either way, we need to learn when to detach ourselves from these types of relationships and learn that it will be painful but time heals all wounds. It will not be the end of the world if you have to take time for yourself and jump back into the dating game later. Toxic relationships can absolutely destroy our sense of peace because everyone wants someone to love and trust and will do anything to have someone they can call their own.

4. Being a doormat- In order to have a peaceful life, you have to know how to deal with conflict in a way that does not leave you in a rut, with feelings of guilt, or feelings of rage. It is not wise to always avoid conflict. In some situations, it is important to voice your opinion or to set boundaries with people who are violating you in some type of way. People who hold negative emotions in for a long period of time will become resentful and can be at risk at snapping at any given moment. Now, snapping may be an extreme example but you never know. The point is, know that you are important and know that you matter. Set boundaries with people, avoid being taken advantage of, and advocate for yourself in uncomfortable situations. It gains you the respect you deserve. Everyone in the world does not have to like you. Being a “people pleaser” is not a way to gain meaningful connections with others. Speak up in a tactful way. Don’t be a “yes man or yes woman.”

5. Constant worry- Face it, there are in things in life we cannot control. We have to live life to fullest and not have a pessimistic attitude. There will things be things that occur that are painful but there is always a time when we rise from these moments with the help of time. When we worry about our futures or the unknown we cause unnecessary stress on ourselves. If you take worrying too far you could end up with constant feelings of anxiety which can prevent you from living normally. When we have a positive attitude and shrug off issues that aren’t too big of a deal we allow ourselves to worry about more important things that matter. Sometimes you have to step into the unknown to discover new things about yourself and discover new opportunities. Worried about taking a new job? Weigh the pros and cons or talk to close friends and family about your concerns. You don’t have to take on stressful situations alone and getting input from others can help us to problem solve. Worried about not being successful? Start planning what you want to achieve and how you will achieve it. Take a few risks. As the saying goes, “no risk, no reward.” And as the other saying goes, “You can’t keep doing the same things and expect different results.” Stop worrying, get bold, and watch your life change.

Take Care

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What things do you think about when you’re sitting alone and you start to contemplate on recent decisions you have made? When it comes to matters of the heart, how often do you reflect on past relationships or your current relationship? Or do other things take priority?

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When Things Begin to Crumble

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